The day I got married, one of my closest friends looked me in the eye and said "God has many wild and wonderful things ahead for you and Jeremy."

Being called mom by 7 kids is definitely wild. Each day I look for the wonder in it all...and give thanks.

Partnering with my husband in life, parenting, work and serving is definitely wonderful. He is my favorite.



Friday, October 3, 2014

How adoption changes....EVERYTHING (series)

Let me just go ahead and apologize right now because I titled this as a "series" but I know good and well that I may get one post written and then not come back for a long time.  Sorry!

I have been noticing changes in me and our life 
that are only so 
because we adopted.

Some unexpected changes.

Kinds of changes that you don't read about 
ahead of time in a book.

FOR EXAMPLE.....

You may have read a previous post A little bit about Emily I wrote 4 years ago.  At that time Emily was in a private school specifically for children on the autism spectrum.  This was a safe, nurturing environment where she learned HOW to learn.  As we looked ahead to adoption, we knew we could not afford the high tuition of private school, there was no way I would throw her to the wolves (have mercy on me) in public school, and so we decided to homeschool. 

Homeschool had it's advantages because it gave us flexibility to all travel when we adopted AND have bonding time when getting all our kids home.

Doesn't that just sound perfect??
(my goodness, I look back and I just die.)

Some of my ideals before adoption as a parent were (are) to overprotect protect, nurture (nice try, but not so much. still trying), and provide the best environment for my kids to thrive. 

I still want all of these things, but I am finding that the best environment for my kids to thrive LOOKS VERY DIFFERENT THAN WHAT I COULD HAVE IMAGINED.

LET ME EXPLAIN.....

We did homeschool (didn't last long), and we did all go to Colombia for 5 weeks to unite our family (you can't even...), and we did cocoon for 3 months after getting home with everyone (I survived it as long as I could).

But hallelujah, praise God, for public school!

5 out of 7 went in December 2012 to public school.  I only kept Emily and Wesley home to finish the program they were doing and to initiate processes with special services at the school for Emily to enter the following Fall.

What has happened since
has really blown me away. 

Have we faced wolves?  
Yes.  More than one child has come home with hurt feelings.
What do we do?  
Pray.  Pray for the one hurt and for the one who does the hurting.

We have also found teachers and coaches who LOVE my kids.
I have seen my kids get hurt and go back the next day, equipped with prayers and support. 
I have seen my kids fail and then succeed. 
I have seen them accomplish far more than they (we) ever imagined. 

I have heard stories of how 
they shine in darkness.

They have learned things and done things 
that I could not have taught them.  

Have they learned more than what I would like them to know? 
Yes.  But with that comes growing in faith (hopefully) in how to handle the things they learn.

If we had not adopted, we would have missed out on so much more than what our big family means to me.  I love my family.  I love all 7 of my kids. 

If I didn't have all 7, I probably would lean towards sheltering and protecting 
a little too much.  

So much so that I would miss 
seeing their potential 
and crazy, big obstacles they overcome.
(this mom would love to tell you more about that 
but I need their permission first.)

So this is the first post in this series...
the changed me who still wants to overprotect, 
but letting God define HOW we will thrive.  

P.S. Please don't think this is a homeschool vs. private school vs. public school discussion.  I have done all 3 and I highly recommend all 3--whatever works best for you and your kids at the present time.

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