We are at the end of the COVID-19 pandemic week 4 quarantine. My
emotions have swung from being grateful everyone has more time at home
to grouchy that everyone has more time at home. I have moments of grace—I
look for those moments in each day when I wake up and recall what the day
before held.
But seconds after I write down what I remember and before I
finish my coffee, I am already disgruntled by the big, hard things going on…like
dreading school work, hoping to get some office work done before kids show up
at my desk, while not knowing what to do with all the other perplexing thoughts
crowding my mind.
It’s the latter that gets me the most.
A few days ago I texted a friend that I was praying God would
use this time to help us all work through what we all needed to
work through….that we didn’t miss it. The day after that text, all Hell broke loose.
Or Heaven? Is this how God was going to answer my prayer?
I believe sometimes it does feel like Hell when God is doing
His most important work on us. Uncomfortable. Uncertain. Unlikely. un Un UN! It’s
NOT fun!
I am uncomfortable with no control. I am uncomfortable not
knowing.
I am uncertain I’ll see change…ever.
If God is answering my prayer, He is choosing an unlikely
path. A path I would not have chosen.
So what do I do in the meantime?
Pray.
Meditate on Scripture.
(this week I’ve been
staring at Psalm 91)
Take it one day at a
time.
And change the ending
of those UN words.
I will not underestimate the God who loves me and who
daily displays his mercy, power, and grace on us.
I will ask for understanding for myself and those
around me where things are unclear.
And I will trust that God is working in a million untold ways
to draw us to Himself, make us more like Him, and to remind us He is with us in
the trouble.
