My Honest Christmas Card

The joys and tears through the years—

here are some we will share with you…

Adopting an older child from another country brings us joy and laughter. Sometimes lots of laughter. Especially when they speak English as a second language and they can't get all the sounds right. One particular difficult sound is the TH sound. It just comes out as a T sound. So if you are ever in third place it really stinks. (it’s ok to laugh, we all do)

We go through lots of everything pretty fast. Toilet paper, food, laundry detergent. But the best (or worst) time was when we ran out of bandaids. Well not totally, but we only had the tiny ones that are good for basically nothing. PERFECT for when my kid shows me a scratch I can't see and they need a bandaid.

But this one night MOM needed a bandaid. I had gauged the back of my ankle pretty deep and the only thing I found was an overnight extra-large size maxi pad. The good news is that I could wrap it all the way around my ankle and put the purple wrapper back around it to keep the sticky side from sticking to the bed. (Can you believe I said maxi pad in my Christmas letter?? I can’t either!)

Just like any normal family, our kids can get pretty annoyed with each other. On one particular hot and bothered ride in the van (our 15 passenger we affectionately call Big Blue), one kid wants to sing along to the song on the radio. Uh oh. Oh no you di'nt. There is a revolt and all singing along is successfully halted for the remainder of the drive. Which was on the way to church....where we joined 400 other people singing along to songs.

God has grown our family in 2017....in the most unexpected way. Jeremy is the king of weekend projects except his weekend project usually turns into a 6 month project--not because he procrastinates, but more so because he decides to build a "barn" that turns into an apartment that is now housing a family of 7. Not even kidding.
The whole family helped in some ways to build this barn but we all know that Dad and Saimon did most of the work.  One afternoon we were installing the metal roof and Jeremy looks at Saimon and says to me, "You know there are not many other 11-year-olds who would do what he is doing." To which I replied, "There are not many other parents who would let their 11-year-old sit at the edge of the roof, 20 feet from the ground, with a drill." We all survived the "barn raising" and enjoy sharing it with the Ngoga family.

Ngoga Family

Dad and Saimon working on the roof

Marian and Saimon

Even some friends came to help
(look closely and you'll see the hammock)

Tearing out the old garage

Having a larger family can create some problems but it can also solve some problems too. Like we never have to discuss where we are going to eat or what we are going to watch. We eat at home and we don't have cable. And most kids have something small and rectangular in their hands they can stare at. (Ugh screens).  But some of my favorite times are when we go where the wifi signal is low and we play Nerts, enjoy friends and eat good food.

 
 

Through the years we have shed some tears but we have also shared in laughter.  

And in 2017 we have laughed more.

Wishing you joy in the gifts God has given you.

And may you have more laughter than tears in the coming year.
Merry Christmas from the Evermons

Come on in

Welcome. Come in. You may use the front door to my house the first time you come over but after that you'll know everyone comes through the side door.

When you enter my house through the side door, you see pieces of our lives all over that first room.  We call it the "front room" although I have no idea why.  It's walls include the front and back of my house.  It used to be a garage for previous owners, but it was closed into the house long before we got here.

The front room holds unorganized lockers for my kids, desks filled with papers to sign or save or just be recycled, an extra refrigerator, a wall full of artwork and projects from my young artists, recycle bins (that also hold artwork at times), and a large dining table and chairs on a beautiful rug.  The dining table and rug do not seem to fit in this cluttered room, but then again they do.

Wow look how clean that table is.  It was Christmas.

Welcome.  Come in through the side door and pass through our clutter and stay a while.  This is how we live.  We invite you in.  We give you access to our lives, our imperfect lives, and hope that by gathering we may grow more.

Grow more like Jesus.

This is not how we live just at home, but this is how we serve.  In everything we do--whether it's work or ministry or parenting.  We don't know how to do it any other way.  We are not perfect.  We are not always equipped.  We can even bumble our way through sometimes pretty bad.  But when we bumble, we ask for forgiveness and we pray and we try again.
 
We have recently opened our home like never before--welcoming a family to come live with us.  We are learning a lot and have only entered kindergarten in the school of "Doing Life Together."  You may be wondering how we all fit now that there are 15 (YES even 16 when Katerin comes home) of us together.  That's for another post.

Laura, Mari and Lily

"My sisters are very important to me." 

Laura is 13, the oldest among the three.  As I watch their video and look at Laura's face when she talks about her sisters, I recognize her face.  The worry, the concern, the sadness if they were separated.  

My daughter, Katerin, will tell you the first time she prayed was when she begged God to keep her and her siblings together. She prayed,

God, if you are real, keep us together...

At the same time, God was preparing us and we were asking, "Lord, where are our kids?"

He answered both of our prayers....in each other.

And in doing so, He drew Katerin into relationship with Him and grew our trust in Him.

You know these girls need a family, but what you may not realize is that your family needs them.

You can know more about them here and contact All God's Children International to learn more.

Jonas and Dylan

Just a little update on these boys--they are spending their first Christmas home with their forever family this year!!  YAY! Thank you, Lord, for their adoption! (December 2018)


Something about these boys remind me of my Saimon and Omar...they have the same age difference between them, they entered the orphanage at the same ages my boys did. But Jonas and Dylan are still there.
I remember days before heading to Colombia to get our kids praying with Carla and Mindy because I was shaking scared. It has been 5 years now and I look at my family and echo David's prayer to God, 

Who am I and what is my family that you have brought us this far?

There are no guarantees in adoption. We risk. We make mistakes. We fail. We pray. We ask God again and again for His strength to be made perfect in our weakness. We beg God to draw us all to Himself.
 
I know the thought of adding teenagers to your family is scary and then layer on from another country, culture, language...it might seem impossible. 

But what might you forfeit if you don't stop and consider? 

I have been abundantly, exceedingly blessed knowing that all of my kids have come to faith in Christ. On the hard days, when relationship is difficult and attitudes abound, I step back and consider eternity. 
My life, our lives, have been forever changed. When I consider their (&my) salvation and that God is just getting started with them (&me)--what impact they already have and will have for generations to come...

the risk is worth it.

  

Watch this short video to learn more about Jonas and Dylan...or message me if you want help starting the process.

https://www.facebook.com/pg/agcintl/videos/?ref=page_internal

Taking the first to college

Our oldest graduated High school in June.  

One wise friend told me to just enjoy it.  Don't think about August.  

Just enjoy this time.  

We have.  

We have celebrated with family and with friends. 

We have made memories this summer and we have counted our blessings.

Now it's August and we leave Tuesday night with her car packed and move her into her dorm Wednesday morning, August 16th.
August 16th....exactly 5 years from our Gotcha Day.  August 16, 2012 -- The day we picked her up from the orphanage and welcomed her into our family.

And now August 16, 2017 we are launching her to college.
Last Wednesday night I heard her share boldly with her peers at church what her prayer is for them as she leaves.  And I reflected on how God has answered our prayers.  As she was shamelessly sharing Scriptures I sat there soaking it in.  Grateful her relationship with Jesus is real and vibrant and contagious.

I have prayed for her trust to grow and replace fear.  And I have seen in my own heart how trust has grown and replaced fear.  I have prayed for her heart to heal from past hurts for her own good and for the good of others.  And I have seen my own heart heal from hurts for my own good and the good of others.
I am full of hope and full of thanks.

The verse she chose for her Graduation Recognition is Proverbs 31:25

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.

As her mom, I could not be more grateful to have been given these last 5 years with her.  And I could not be more thrilled to see what God has for her next. 

Simple Treasures

Christmas is not easy in my family.  For lots of reasons.  This year was not any easier but I did find some simple treasures I will hold onto from this year.  And when I say simple, I mean simple.  For most around my table, these things would not have even been noticed.

We did not have "Christmas" with my extended family until January 2nd because earlier in December, we lost my grandmother.  My mom's mom.  Many people called her Thelma or Ms. Nash and a few called her Grandma, but most in our family called her Mama Nash.

This pic was taken just a couple weeks before she passed

She was 96 and well loved and well cared for by my uncle and his family primarily.  The first treasure is not just our time together with all the Nash's to remember Mama Nash, but the things I heard for the first time....

...like my mom telling me what a good mom Mama Nash was, especially during my mom's teen years.  I have heard my mom talk about growing up with her brothers, not having much, not feeling pretty as a young girl, but hardly anything about her mom.  

"...especially in my teen years."

That was a gift to hear.  

And I wonder if mom thought Mama Nash was a good mom while she was still a teen...or if she realized it later.  I'll have to ask!

Treasure #2 came Christmas Eve when Jeremy's family came over after the Christmas Eve service and we sat around our living room and patio and talked, and watched the Texans, and skyped with his brother on the other side of the planet.  Gathering.  Eating. Talking and listening and laughing.  These simple things were gifts for my soul.  

Treasure #3 happened New Year's Eve.  We attempted to have a party but friends had plans already so my 4 girls ended up going elsewhere with friends for the night and Jeremy got tickets to the Rockets for the boys, which left me at home....ALONE....for FIVE HOURS.  

Five whole hours where I did not have to answer a question or help anyone or fix supper and answer the question of "what's for supper?"  So I ate chocolate cake and cheese bread for dinner and made myself sit on the couch and watch a movie.  It was lovely.  A treasure for this introvert who has had people at home 100% of the time the past 2 weeks.

Treasure #4 is my mom.  She is precious.  And hilarious.  And amazing.  And the best part is that she doesn't even know it.  So fast forward to January 2nd when we have my extended family over for Christmas and we are sitting around the kitchen table eating Chinese takeout (because that's how I make Christmas dinner) and my big brother is talking about how the veggies we get at the grocery store are covered in pesticides blah blah blah and at some point he asks, "And do you know what the first ingredient in Roundup is?"  AND MY MOM without hesitation says, "Glyphosate."

I think my brother meant it as a rhetorical question in his dissertation but my mom just casually drops "glyphosate" as if this is an everyday conversation.   I looked around the table and was probably the only one in awe but my goodness.  Who knows the first ingredient in Roundup??

I think that is amazing and hilarious and makes my mom precious.  Treasure.

These small things--gathering, eating (even Chinese takeout), quiet NYE, glyphosate--helped me get through another hard Christmas.

You may be wondering why Christmas is hard, especially when you read my previous post and see our beautiful family pics (thanks to Hannah at MHW Photography).  I can't really begin to describe the layers to it, but it has to do with loss, broken families, expectations, disappointment.

What was once my favorite time of the year, so much so that we chose to get married in December and give our daughter the middle name Noel, is (for now) a time I mostly endure and seek treasures in the midst of grief.  Even the smallest treasures.

Christmas Carol Card 2016

You may know us pretty well by now.  But in case you don’t, I thought I would give you a little description of each member of the family through Christmas Carol titles.

First you have to guess!  Draw an imaginary line from the person to the Christmas Carol and see if you get it right.

Jeremy                                                                                                                                           Away in a Manger

Vanessa                                                                                                                                         The Twelve Days of Christmas

Katerin                                                                                                                                           O Come Emmanuel

Emily                                                                                                                                               Feliz Navidad

Marian                                                                                                                                            Jolly Old St. Nicholas.

Wesley                                                                                                                                            Mary, Did You Know?

Omar                                                                                                                                               The First Noel

Saimon                                                                                                                                            Joy to the World

Savannah                                                                                                                              God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Jeremy, with his graying handsome go-tee, and how he handles work and family with wisdom, perseverance and humor….you guessed it; he gets Jolly Old St. Nicholas.  I am thankful for this guy—he loves us faithfully and humbly.  K.E.E.P.E.R.

Vanessa, wife to Jolly Old St. Nicholas, mom to 4 teenagers and 3 pre-teens (SELAH), office assistant to Mr. Jolly, and author of the Christmas letter, life is…..bountiful.  And Jesus is fully present.  O Come Emmanual!

We have a senior in the house—Katerin!  We’re proud of how hard this girl works in school and her job.  She has been accepted into UMHB where she plans to study International Business next Fall.  Don’t be fooled, Katerin is not all about work.  She has found a lively bunch of friends at school and church and spends much of her free time with this great group.   For our oldest Colombian…..Feliz Navidad!

We gave our first born daughter the name Emily Noel because we loved the name Emily and loved the Christmas season.  So you can probably guess which Christmas Carol is hers…The First Noel (in case you were still struggling).  Emily is in her junior year of High school and she has big plans for this next year—that change every other week.

Marian, a sophomore on the brink of getting her driver’s license, meets the world with enthusiasm, optimism, and excitement.  Marian works hard maintaining her grades, working as a gymnastics coach/office assistant, and keeping up her social calendar.  Whatever God has planned for Marian, she will make it fun.  Marian’s song title—Joy to the World!

Another sophomore in the house, Wesley, is growing into a huge young man.  I still can’t believe it when I look at him.  The doctor says he’s growing so much because he gets good sleep.  This kid can sleep!  He is the first in bed and is ready for the house to be quiet and dark by 8:00pm (on school nights, different story on the weekends).  He is a merry gentleman when he gets lots of rest.  Wes will also be a driver by the summer and he is a big fan—Astros, Rockets, Texans, Baylor—whoever is playing. 

Omar recently celebrated his 12th birthday.  I told you last year about how he creates things and gives it something extra for the wow factor.  Okay, he still does--and the other day he took it up a few notches.  He built a boat with Legos, no big deal, but then he took apart one of his remote control cars and wired his Lego boat so that when he connected the wires to a AA battery, the propeller spun.  He’s twelve and he can hotwire a Lego boat.  It’s Twelve Days of Christmas for this kid. 

Saimon, a.k.a the informant, wants to be a police officer, a marine, or a missionary when he grows up.  Whichever he chooses, he will be AWESOME because this kid does not miss a thing (serious FOMO) and he finds such delight in being the first to tell you about it. Song—Silent Night (JUST KIDDING)  Do You Hear What I Hear?  …Wait, it’s Go Tell it on the Mountain…or better yet Mary, Did You Know?

Savannah—the youngest arrow in our quiver.  This girl is Miss Independent.  On a typical afternoon, she heads down “Ms. Anissa’s street” (even though we are friends with about 7 other neighbors on the street that she visits, Savannah has given the entire street to Ms. Anissa) and she finds a friend or dog to hang out with for a while.  In her free time at home she is off to herself lost in a book or episodes of her favorite shows, or decorating her “peace and quiet room.” (Located just outside the gameroom door on the far side of the house).  Her carol? Away in a Manger.

How did you do?  You know us a little better than last year? If you didn’t do so hot, don’t worry because neither did some of my kids.

In closing We want to wish YOU a Merry Christmas as you Deck the Halls and remember that Silent Night, Holy Night long ago.

Love from the Evermon’s

P.S. Don’t Let Grandma Get Runover by a Reindeer!